[Esikko was cold. And yet Hiyori doesn't feel any better after he lets go. Does he want someone to cling to, or would he rather be alone? Even he doesn't know. He wants...
His partner and his old life back, but that's not about to happen.
He turns his eyes slowly on the bottle. It takes him a moment to even realize what Esikko is talking about, and then he waves a hand in dismissal.]
I don't need that stuff.
[Then he pads back to the couch.
He can't bring himself to touch any of Jun's things, so those are still sitting out. The slippers, the shoes, the exercise gear. There is an electrical kettle and tea available—just on a table, since he isn't high-ranked enough for a kitchenette. Esikko should also hopefully notice his sunflowers: those are prominently displayed, and boy, have they grown. He sang to them daily after all, though he hasn't in the past twenty-four hours, something they've perhaps registered and find concerning. Interestingly, there are more sunflowers than Esikko originally gifted him: a few potted dwarf sunflowers sit next to the taller ones, also well-bloomed (and also magically infused). Looks like he has another supplier.
Hiyori brushes past the flowers and sits on the couch. He pulls one end of a blanket around himself, knitted and green with uneven edges. The other end, he holds out.]
You should come here if you want to get warm. I have my Aura, too, remember?
[The offer sounds somewhat rote, his face oddly blank. But he'd prefer this over getting drunk for warmth, something he knows will only lead to him crying for hours.]
( Spoken with a sigh, Esikko leaves the bottle on a nearby table before moving to take the other side of that blanket. He doesn't hesitate, this time, to scoot closer, though he is careful about where his cold skin touches. He can warm up underneath this blanket, and maybe Hiyori would feel nicer being able to help someone— maybe similarly to Bakugo? )
If this company is what helps you more, then I don't mind it.
( He just thought the alcohol might numb things, and he himself falls on that far too easily, he knows. But Hiyori is able to deal with things better than just running away, huh? Esikko sighs quietly, and then allows his weight to lean slightly towards Hiyori. As he does, his eyes travel the room, noting the flowers, both his own gifts and the others. )
How does someone as sunny as you deal with times like these?
[Was it strength the one time he got sloshed after Rinne disappeared and cried on multiple people at the Red Cardinal? He doesn't think so, but he's too tired to argue.
He isn't avoiding Esikko or his skin, for whatever that's worth. When he scoots next to him on the couch Hiyori leans against his side, letting go of the blanket and taking one of his hands.]
Well, I always knew something like this could happen. I just...
[He trails off.
He just what? What did he hope for? That they'd both beat the odds and somehow go home, even though their Game 52 progress was glacial? That they'd turn into statues together, or that he'd go first, before Jun? As soon as that last thought occurs to him, his stomach churns, and he feels so sick with guilt that Esikko might just feel it too. The idea of harboring such a selfish wish disgusts him. It's better this way, he reminds himself, no matter how badly it hurts. Since he's still here, he can use his Wish to save Jun.
He shakes off those thoughts, or tries to. It's time to focus on activating his Aura. All he needs to do is concentrate, and he'll warm them both right up, starting from where their hands are joined. But even though he focuses...
There's no warmth coming.]
... sorry. [He frowns.] I don't know why it's not working.
...Magic is affected by emotions, no matter the world.
( This aura thing, or anything else? How could he provide extra warmth while drowning in these negative feelings? Still, Esikko squeezes his hand back after a moment. )
But your hand is plenty warm, to me.
( He's not sure if it sounds stupid, saying it like that, mumbled like it's foreign for him to be saying anything even close. But what else can he do? It's true, so he thinks it's worth at least trying. Hiyori is naturally warmer than him— and Hiyori is naturally sunnier than him, too. So his company will always help, even if he doesn't think it is. That's the sort of message he's trying to get across. )
We don't have to say a word, if you'd rather not, you know. We can simply sit here, if that's enough.
[He says nothing in response to the first thing. Just looks sad and disappointed. He feels betrayed, almost. Wasn't his Aura always supposed to work? But it's true he can't concentrate on much right now, and it wouldn't be the strangest thing if it did stop. The girl who taught him how to use it is gone, after all. Her and so many other friends.
Will he disappear and turn into a statue, too? Before he even has a chance to save Jun...?
His stomach is a pit of anxiety. He's afraid of being trapped forever and afraid of disappearing. Either way, he fears being alone. So, as Esikko squeezes his hand back, says he is warm, and says they can just there... it does help soothe his nerves.]
... mm.
[The dejected look on his face hasn't gone away, but the clawing anxiety is kept at bay. Cold or not, it feels good to have someone by his side. And Esikko is saying he can lean on him, basically, so that's what Hiyori does: he squeezes his hand back, and then he finally slumps against Esikko's side, head coming to rest on his shoulder.]
Thanks. [Murmured softly.] I'll need more help at some point, but for now, this is good.
[Esikko's card is what he'll need. His card, so he can put it towards helping Jun. So he can make his Wish come true. But that's a long ways off, much as it frustrates him, so for now, this is enough.]
( All he can think to do is stay sitting and support Hiyori through this. Emotionally, and physically, allowing him to slump and lean against him without so much as a complaint.
He's not used to being a support, not much. There were times he'd have deep discussions with Dabi, but that was about it, wasn't it? Bakugo had listened to him vent about his own things various times, but never wanted to share about himself. It was only Dabi who trusted him enough to share a little about his own family, about his troubles, about his world. Little bits, here and there. And for that, it was easy to come up with suggestions: drinking, breaking things, going out and causing trouble to get their minds off of things.
Hiyori isn't soothed by chaos like that, is he? And so Esikko has to think extra hard about what might be best, and that effort is... foreign. New. Not bad, necessarily, but he's worried he might screw it up as he considers. However, all of that focus and concentration means that he's not worsening the feelings in their emotional connection at all— he's acting as a sturdy pillar. )
Well, I'll be here for when you need it, then. Until then, whether you want to talk as much as usual, or sit here unusually quiet, I don't mind.
( Surprisingly gentle... )
Actually, if it might help you to turn your own mind off for a while, I could ramble about a few things myself.
["Unusually quiet" isn't wrong; even Hiyori can acknowledge he talks a lot. So when Esikko proposes doing the talking for once, it's a switch. Something on his mind? Or is just for distraction?
Probably the second one. Either way Hiyori hums again, still curled up against his side.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
His partner and his old life back, but that's not about to happen.
He turns his eyes slowly on the bottle. It takes him a moment to even realize what Esikko is talking about, and then he waves a hand in dismissal.]
I don't need that stuff.
[Then he pads back to the couch.
He can't bring himself to touch any of Jun's things, so those are still sitting out. The slippers, the shoes, the exercise gear. There is an electrical kettle and tea available—just on a table, since he isn't high-ranked enough for a kitchenette. Esikko should also hopefully notice his sunflowers: those are prominently displayed, and boy, have they grown. He sang to them daily after all, though he hasn't in the past twenty-four hours, something they've perhaps registered and find concerning. Interestingly, there are more sunflowers than Esikko originally gifted him: a few potted dwarf sunflowers sit next to the taller ones, also well-bloomed (and also magically infused). Looks like he has another supplier.
Hiyori brushes past the flowers and sits on the couch. He pulls one end of a blanket around himself, knitted and green with uneven edges. The other end, he holds out.]
You should come here if you want to get warm. I have my Aura, too, remember?
[The offer sounds somewhat rote, his face oddly blank. But he'd prefer this over getting drunk for warmth, something he knows will only lead to him crying for hours.]
no subject
( Spoken with a sigh, Esikko leaves the bottle on a nearby table before moving to take the other side of that blanket. He doesn't hesitate, this time, to scoot closer, though he is careful about where his cold skin touches. He can warm up underneath this blanket, and maybe Hiyori would feel nicer being able to help someone— maybe similarly to Bakugo? )
If this company is what helps you more, then I don't mind it.
( He just thought the alcohol might numb things, and he himself falls on that far too easily, he knows. But Hiyori is able to deal with things better than just running away, huh? Esikko sighs quietly, and then allows his weight to lean slightly towards Hiyori. As he does, his eyes travel the room, noting the flowers, both his own gifts and the others. )
How does someone as sunny as you deal with times like these?
no subject
He isn't avoiding Esikko or his skin, for whatever that's worth. When he scoots next to him on the couch Hiyori leans against his side, letting go of the blanket and taking one of his hands.]
Well, I always knew something like this could happen. I just...
[He trails off.
He just what? What did he hope for? That they'd both beat the odds and somehow go home, even though their Game 52 progress was glacial? That they'd turn into statues together, or that he'd go first, before Jun? As soon as that last thought occurs to him, his stomach churns, and he feels so sick with guilt that Esikko might just feel it too. The idea of harboring such a selfish wish disgusts him. It's better this way, he reminds himself, no matter how badly it hurts. Since he's still here, he can use his Wish to save Jun.
He shakes off those thoughts, or tries to. It's time to focus on activating his Aura. All he needs to do is concentrate, and he'll warm them both right up, starting from where their hands are joined. But even though he focuses...
There's no warmth coming.]
... sorry. [He frowns.] I don't know why it's not working.
no subject
( This aura thing, or anything else? How could he provide extra warmth while drowning in these negative feelings? Still, Esikko squeezes his hand back after a moment. )
But your hand is plenty warm, to me.
( He's not sure if it sounds stupid, saying it like that, mumbled like it's foreign for him to be saying anything even close. But what else can he do? It's true, so he thinks it's worth at least trying. Hiyori is naturally warmer than him— and Hiyori is naturally sunnier than him, too. So his company will always help, even if he doesn't think it is. That's the sort of message he's trying to get across. )
We don't have to say a word, if you'd rather not, you know. We can simply sit here, if that's enough.
no subject
[He says nothing in response to the first thing. Just looks sad and disappointed. He feels betrayed, almost. Wasn't his Aura always supposed to work? But it's true he can't concentrate on much right now, and it wouldn't be the strangest thing if it did stop. The girl who taught him how to use it is gone, after all. Her and so many other friends.
Will he disappear and turn into a statue, too? Before he even has a chance to save Jun...?
His stomach is a pit of anxiety. He's afraid of being trapped forever and afraid of disappearing. Either way, he fears being alone. So, as Esikko squeezes his hand back, says he is warm, and says they can just there... it does help soothe his nerves.]
... mm.
[The dejected look on his face hasn't gone away, but the clawing anxiety is kept at bay. Cold or not, it feels good to have someone by his side. And Esikko is saying he can lean on him, basically, so that's what Hiyori does: he squeezes his hand back, and then he finally slumps against Esikko's side, head coming to rest on his shoulder.]
Thanks. [Murmured softly.] I'll need more help at some point, but for now, this is good.
[Esikko's card is what he'll need. His card, so he can put it towards helping Jun. So he can make his Wish come true. But that's a long ways off, much as it frustrates him, so for now, this is enough.]
no subject
He's not used to being a support, not much. There were times he'd have deep discussions with Dabi, but that was about it, wasn't it? Bakugo had listened to him vent about his own things various times, but never wanted to share about himself. It was only Dabi who trusted him enough to share a little about his own family, about his troubles, about his world. Little bits, here and there. And for that, it was easy to come up with suggestions: drinking, breaking things, going out and causing trouble to get their minds off of things.
Hiyori isn't soothed by chaos like that, is he? And so Esikko has to think extra hard about what might be best, and that effort is... foreign. New. Not bad, necessarily, but he's worried he might screw it up as he considers. However, all of that focus and concentration means that he's not worsening the feelings in their emotional connection at all— he's acting as a sturdy pillar. )
Well, I'll be here for when you need it, then. Until then, whether you want to talk as much as usual, or sit here unusually quiet, I don't mind.
( Surprisingly gentle... )
Actually, if it might help you to turn your own mind off for a while, I could ramble about a few things myself.
( Gossip, really. )
no subject
Probably the second one. Either way Hiyori hums again, still curled up against his side.]
Mm. Let's hear it.